As the parent of a student-athlete, stories about sports injuries and deaths like that of high school football player Damon Janes are harrowing. Janes, 16, was hit hard during an early game this season, passed out on the sidelines and three days later, died in the hospital. Every practice, every game, we trust the coaching staff with our sons and daughters, just hoping that they'll give our kids enough playing time and maybe end the season with a winning record. But what we're really doing is putting our children's lives in their hands. We're relying on them to keep our kids safe in an environment where "safety" means strapping on a helmet and pads, and there's a right and wrong way to hit someone.
The scary reality is that the average high school coach is only required to undergo CPR and basic first aid certification, pretty much the same training as the babysitter you'd hire to watch your 5-year-old. Though helpful, neither is hardly enough to deal with the types of things that take place on the field. And while emergency medical personnel are on hand during games to handle injuries, it's often the kids who, like Janes, are able to walk to the sidelines themselves who suffer the worst fates. Sometimes, it's the ones who don't get any medical attention at all because they didn't let anyone know that they were hurt; they were too scared or too tough.
Unfortunately, the "walk it off" mentality still exists in sports: from coaches and parents who expect too much of young athletes, to players who are willing to push themselves to dangerous limits for the sake of the game. As the wife of a coach for 12 years, I've seen it. Sadly, as a mother, I'm guilty of it myself. And I've watched my own son almost bragging about his football injuries as if they were trophies, injuries that were never reported to his coach.
So how do we, as parents, find any kind of comfort? How do we continue to allow our kids to take the field, knowing the risks involved?
I suppose that answer differs for everyone, but for me, it required me to take a step back. I had to ask myself, what other time in my life have I just blindly handed my child over to someone else and expected them to care for him, assuming that they know everything? Never! So why was I doing it now? Why was I being so irresponsible?
Perhaps there was a level of intimidation. I'll admit, I don't everything there is to know about football. But there are some things that I need to know, some things that I need to do.
If I'm going to continue to allow my son to participate in contact team sports, I need to be responsible and educate myself about the dangers. I should be able to recognize the signs of a concussion, and make sure that my son knows them, too. He should understand that regardless of how "hard" he thinks he is, his life is nothing to play games with, so if he's hurt, he needs to tell his coach. And I need to make it clear to the coach that when it comes to my son, there is no "walking it off."
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